. . . the iPlanter! Being a bit of a self-professed technophobe (see earlier rant), I was gratified to find a use for my nifty iPhone.

Note: while Spring-flowering bulbs like tulips are easy to grow, be careful how you gently nestle the tulip bulbs into the touchscreen; I found pounding a screwdriver on its blunt end to be quite effective.  The iPhone offers up to 20 touchscreen “keys” for planting, so you’ll have plenty of opportunity to nurture a spectacular bouquet!

When finished planting the bulbs, place your new iPlanter in a cool spot and cover with several inches of mulch.  Be sure to check it often and water when necessary. Note again: upon your first watering, you should surrender any hope of effective emailing, web browsing or even a secure Wi-Fi connection.

In lieu of plant food, I suggest taking advantage of The App Store: I found the fart and beer-pouring applications to be both inexpensive and quite effective as plant fertilizer. Enjoy your iPlanter and HAPPY PLANTING!

For more tips on how to misuse your technology, visit my Curious Paintings.